Biscuits, dammit!!

Those of you who have perused my “things to do before I die” list will know that I cannot, for some reason, bake satisfactory biscuits.

Now that I really want to make a concerted effort to score some of those things off the list, like NOW, I figure I should start with the ones which should on paper be most easily achieved.

I know that some of you who regularly read my blog are outstanding cooks. So I am asking you to go- RIGHT NOW- and find me your best recipe for biscuits or cookies and post them.

I don’t care if you don’t know me. Do as I say!!!! Deranged woman with life threatening illness here, do not mess with me!! πŸ˜€

Being a man is NOT an excuse. If you can’t cook, ask your significant other, mother, people you work with, I don’t care.

Oh, BTW, “open cookie mix, mix as per instructions” will NOT get you the gold star for best recipe. I prefer cooking from scratch.

All posted recipes will be tried and tested by me and my offspring. The winner will get MUCH public kudos and many virtual hugs from me!

Thank you! Now GO!!! And return promptly! πŸ˜€


14 Responses to “Biscuits, dammit!!”

  1. 1 emma
    August 4, 2008 at 1:55 pm

    I too had never made any successful biscuits until I decided to have a go only last Friday (coincidence or what). I typed “easy cookies” into google and made these ones (partly to give as a gift) – http://www.easy-cookies.com/oatmeal_raisin.htm
    They were, indeed, incredibly easy and a complete success first time around. I used some chopped dates as well as raisins, just because I like em. I heartily commend the site to you. Go forth and conquer.

    Sounds lovely, Emma! Thank you, I will make those this weekend! Maybe even before then…. πŸ˜€

  2. August 4, 2008 at 4:50 pm

    I’m posting two, because I’m rebellious like that! πŸ™‚

    Double Chocolate Pudding Cookies

    1 c. butter
    1/4 c. white sugar
    3/4 c. brown sugar
    1 t. vanilla
    2 eggs
    2 1/4 c. all-purpose flour
    3 oz. instant chocolate pudding mix
    1 t. baking soda
    1 package chocolate chips

    Beat butter & sugars together until creamy. Beat in eggs and vanilla. In separate bowl, combine flour, pudding mix, and baking soda. Stir into butter/sugar mixture until well-combined. Stir in chocolate chips.
    Bake on ungreased cookie sheets at 350 for 8-10 minutes.

    * * * * *
    Monster Cookies

    3 eggs
    1 cup brown sugar
    1 cup white sugar
    1/2 tsp. vanilla
    1/2 Tablespoon light corn syrup
    2 tsp. baking soda
    1 stick butter
    1 1/2 cups creamy peanut butter
    4 1/2 cups rolled oats
    1/2 package chocolate chips
    1/2 lb. M&Ms

    Mix ingredients in order, beating each addition through the peanut butter, and stirring in oats, chocolate chips, and M&Ms by hand. Drop by LARGE spoonfuls onto baking sheets and bake at 350 for 12-15 minutes

    Those sound great, Laura- chocolate pudding mix- is that the kind you mix with milk and put in the fridge, or something else? I still need to work out what we use instead of corn syrup! Will definitely try those! Thanks!

  3. August 4, 2008 at 5:34 pm

    I give you this one as I have seen devout vegans devour these with wild abandon and on one notable occasion a request for marriage!

    Caramel Squares

    4oz Butter
    2oz Caster Sugar
    6oz Plain Flour

    8oz butter
    4oz Caster Sugar
    4 Tablespoons golden syrup
    405g tin Condensed Milk

    8oz Chocolate (I recommend Green and Blacks)
    1/2oz butter (optional – personally I don’t bother with it)


    Mix all ingredients to make a firm dough
    Press into a well greased dish
    Cook for 15 minutes at 180C
    Allow to Cool

    Put all ingredients into a saucepan and heat until dissolved
    Bring to the boil and simmer for 8-10minutes stirring constantly
    Allow to cool for 2 minutes
    Pour onto base
    Allow to cool

    Melt chocolate (and butter) in a bowl
    Pour over filling
    Allow to cool.


    Ohhhhh, Ricky, those sound amazing!!! Thank you for that! I will definitely be making these, especially as all of my family have a particular liking for caramel squares!

  4. 4 Emma Curtis
    August 4, 2008 at 7:39 pm

    I’m going to post ‘double chocolate cookies’ once I’ve eaten my dinner….Haven’t made them for years though….

  5. 5 Emma Curtis
    August 4, 2008 at 7:47 pm

    You really do suffer OCD internet!! I think it must be contagious! I have FAR too many cook books but the one I must recommend, that I have used more than any other, is Mary Berry ‘One step ahead’….buy it!!!

  6. August 4, 2008 at 8:11 pm

    Yep! Instant chocolate pudding mix is the powdered stuff that you whisk with milk. πŸ™‚

  7. August 4, 2008 at 8:36 pm

    My Granny in Alabama has the best biscuit recipe! Unfortunately she doesn’t have it wrote down, she just does it without measuring. She also wears a pair of underwear on her head as a hair-net when she bakes…perhaps that’s the secret!

    Mack, I like your Granny’s style! She sounds like the woman I will become if I can only get through my current illness! Underwear makes a perfect headband!! When I saw your username, I actually thought you might be my little brother, whose nickname is Macules (as in Hercules but not) and he shares your first name going by your email address. πŸ˜€ Thanks for stopping by, I appreciate it!

  8. August 4, 2008 at 9:11 pm

    I’ll be praying for you, from what I’ve read it sounds like they’ve got it pretty under control and you caught it early on. My granny (the one with the biscuits and underwear…gee that sounds wierd) is a BC survivor. She used to let us parade around the house in her bra with built in boobs because hers were removed. She got a kick out of it, but my parents would be horrified!

    Also Mackalicious was my pledge name when I joined a fraternity. They said it was because I had a following of ladies…I wish they would have pointed them out because I never saw them. Oh well, my wife is probably happier they didn’t!

    Your Granny sounds like a fabulous woman. I totally approve of all of her behaviours! πŸ™‚ Thanks for bringing cheer to my day!

  9. 9 Skry
    August 4, 2008 at 9:19 pm

    I don’t really have a sweet tooth, but I do like 15’s and truffles. As such I have looked up a couple or recipies for 15’s:

    Normal – http://uktv.co.uk/food/peoplescookbook/recipe/aid/582880
    With walnuts – http://www.recipezaar.com/44077

    And here are a couple of chocolate truffle ones:
    Normal – http://www.joyofbaking.com/ChocolateTruffles.html
    Delia – http://www.deliaonline.com/text-only/recipes/home-made-chocolate-truffles,796,RC.html

    Truffles are completely terrible for you as they contain 241 calories per calorie!! Mostly cream, chocolate, sugar and alcohol. They take a bit of work but they are SO worth it πŸ˜€

    Awww, thanks love, I will definitely try those! 241 calories per calorie?!! Holy shit!! πŸ˜€

  10. 10 Emma Curtis
    August 4, 2008 at 9:45 pm

    125g white choc
    125g dark choc
    125g unsalted butter, softened
    125g caster
    1 egg
    1 tsp vanilla extract
    125g porridge oats
    150g plain flour
    1/2 tsp baking powder

    Chop choc into chunks
    cream butter and sugar until pale, add egg, vanilla and oats. Sift in flour (but Delia would tell you ‘modern’ flour doesn’t need sifted!), baking powder and mix. stir in choc chunks. Place dessertspoonfuls of mix on 2 lightly greased baking sheets, well apart. Flatten each one lightly with a fork.
    Bake 180C fan oven 12-15 minsuntil risen and turning golden, leave on baking sheet for 5 mins then wire rack.

    How easy is that!!! The Gospel according to ‘Good Housekeeping Institute’

    Arhghhhh…..in a Homer Simpson, those-sound-too-good-to-be-true stylie!!! πŸ˜€ Thank you….these are coming very high at the top of the have-to-make-first list! πŸ˜€

  11. August 4, 2008 at 10:39 pm

    Ok, so here in the states biscuits are not cookies. So I was going to post my favorite biscuit recipe, but it’s not a cookie one! http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/southern-biscuits-recipe/index.html LOL!

    As for cookies, hmm, I’ll have to look into it. I don’t make them that often.

    Thanks Noah! Don’t you just love the language barrier- I am so confused now, lol! πŸ˜€

  12. 12 Lauren
    August 5, 2008 at 3:49 pm

    These make the best biscuits. Like you I couldn’t make biscuits to save my life but these turn out every time.

    Homemade Biscuits

    2 cups self rising flour
    1 TBSP Sugar
    ΒΌ C (1/2 stick) salted butter
    1 ΒΌ C heavy whipping cream

    Preheat oven to 450. Combine flour and sugar. Cut butter into flour with fork until mixture is crumbly. Stir in cream, mixing until dry ingredients are moistened.

    Turn dough out onto a lightly floured surface, and kneed 5-7 times. Roll dough out to 1/2in thickness; cut with a 3 in biscuit cutter or glass dipped in flour.

    Place on a greased baking sheet 1 in apart. Bake 12-14min until golden.

    Makes 1 dozen.

    Sound yummy! Thank you!!

  13. 13 thecrazymommafiles
    August 10, 2008 at 7:24 am

    Noah, I almost did the same thing. Now I’m off to find my cookie recipe. That is if I don’t forget between now and making it to the kitchen! πŸ˜€

  14. 14 thecrazymommafiles
    August 10, 2008 at 5:24 pm

    Ok…here is my recipe for cookies or in your case biscuits. I call them Mom’s Nutty Chocolate Chip Cookies. I included metric measurements (found online so I hope they work for you) so hopefully you won’t have the same problem you had before.

    1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
    3/4 cup (12 tablespoons or 6 fl. oz) sugar
    3/4 cup (12 tablespoons or 6 fl. oz) light (golden) brown sugar
    1 teaspoon (1/3 tablespoon) vanilla extract
    2 eggs
    2 1/4 cups (1pint or 16 fl. oz plus 1 tablespoon or 2 fl. oz) all purpose flour
    1 teaspoon (1/3 tablespoon) baking soda
    1/2 teaspoon salt (no metric unit found…)
    2 cups (1 pint or 16 fl. oz) milk chocolate (or semi sweet) chocolate chips, whichever you prefer…I use milk chocolate
    1 cup (1/2 pint or 8 fl. oz) chopped nuts, your preference, I usually use pecans.

    ** You may also add 2 oz corn syrup to the sugar/butter mixture after creaming, but before adding the eggs, if you want them chewier.

    1. Heat oven to 375 degrees.

    2. Beat butter, sugar, brown sugar, and vanilla with mixer until creamy. (This is where you want to add the corn syrup is you prefer.) Add the eggs, one at a time and mix well.

    3. Stir together flour, baking soda, and salt. Add to the sugar and butter mixture gradually and beat until well blended. Stir in chocolate chips and nuts.

    4. Place rounded teaspoonsfuls on a cookie sheet and bake for 8-10 minutes or until lightly browned. Cool on the cookie sheet for a few minutes and then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely.

    From reading your blog, I know you like to cook so you probably already know this. But just in case, I line my cookie sheets with parchment paper and the cookies turn out gorgeous. They don’t stick and there is no mess to clean up. I always thought this little baking tool was a waste of money. But now I’m so glad that one of the ladies on my baking forum turned me on to it. I will never bake cookies/biscuits without it again. $4 buck well spent.

    Hope you decided to try these and if so, I hope you enjoy them.

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