I have some bad news

I can’t believe I am having to type this.

I found a tiny, barely noticeable lump under my arm about three weeks ago, and my GP referred my to a surgeon to get it checked out.

I have breast cancer.

I went to my appointment yesterday evening. The surgeon couldn’t even find the lump, but sent me to have an ultrasound on the area just to be sure. They found two lumps in my underarm area (the second one is too deep for me to have felt it). They put a needle in both of the lumps and drew cells out, and when they dyed it and looked at it under a microscope, they were able to confirm it.

I have another appointment with the surgeon on Thursday afternoon. I will have an MRI, and they will tell me what the course of action is.

I will definitely be losing my right breast and will have to have three courses of chemo. They tell me they can reconstruct my breast- in fact I have to look at pictures on Thursday (!!) and I will be losing all of my hair.

One of the lumps is the lymph node under my arm.

I’m shit scared, vomit-enducing terrifed at the moment. I am alternating between complete shock, terror and tears.

I don’t know what the future will bring. Please pray for me that we’ve caught this early. They couldn’t give me a prognosis at this stage.


16 Responses to “I have some bad news”

  1. 1 Emma Curtis
    July 30, 2008 at 1:08 pm

    Suzy, So sorry to hear your news. My friend is half way through treatment at the minute- your strength of character and amazing personality will pull you through. I will be praying for you.

  2. July 30, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    More hugs, Suzy. Just, hugs.

  3. July 30, 2008 at 2:44 pm

    Sending you lots more hugs! Love you! You will beat this!

  4. July 30, 2008 at 3:25 pm

    We are with you every step of the way, Suzy. Much, much love…

  5. 5 Andrea R
    July 30, 2008 at 4:53 pm

    Oh Suzy, I’m so so sorry. I can’t imagine all the emotions you are going through. Many hugs from Arizona. Hang in there! You WILL beat this!!

  6. 6 Skry
    July 30, 2008 at 8:02 pm

    My aunt had breast cancer and they didn’t detect it early. Still, she had her breast and some glands under that arm removed and is now completely over it, and she’s retirement age. You’re young and have caught it at an early stage.

    Sooz I can’t possibly send you enough hugs to make this alright, but I’m gonna try. You’re in my thoughts and I’m sure that you’ll be able to see this through.


  7. July 30, 2008 at 8:20 pm

    Oh Suzy, my heart is breaking for you right now. I will be keeping you in my prayers constantly. I can’t even come close to saying I know what this feels like or how scared you must be, but I will do all that I can to keep up on the prayers for you! Let me know if you ever need to talk, you know I am here! Email, IM, Webcam…… xoxoxoxo

  8. July 30, 2008 at 8:30 pm

    So, so, so many hugs, friend. I wish I could be right there with you. You know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

  9. July 30, 2008 at 10:16 pm

    Suzy, you are in our prayers.

  10. July 30, 2008 at 11:01 pm

    Oh Suzy, I’m so sorry to hear about this. As a cancer survivor, I know how terrifying it is to face a diagnosis like that, especially with so much unknown. I will be praying for you and I hope it’s a very benign type of cancer and that your treatment will get rid of it quickly. *hugs*

  11. July 30, 2008 at 11:22 pm

    We are all thinking about you here and wish you the best possible outcome.
    Lots of love and hugs xxx

  12. July 31, 2008 at 1:50 am

    Suzy, my heart and my prayers go out to you. Much love from all of us ((hugs))

  13. 13 layla2376
    July 31, 2008 at 7:58 am

    Suzy, I tried all yesterday to leave amessage here. You haven’t been far from my thoughts, you have so much love coming your way from everyone. Stu sends his love too xx

  14. August 1, 2008 at 3:55 am

    Oh Suzy… I’m just sick over hearing this news. I am sending you all my love an support right now. If you need anything, ANYTHING (that I can provide from a few thousand miles away) don’t hesitate to ask.

    You will constantly be in my thoughts and my heart as you go through this. I love you, girl.

  15. 15 thecrazymommafiles
    August 10, 2008 at 10:05 am

    Suzy, You don’t know me and I’m not sure how I found your blog. But I’ve perused your blog and have enjoyed your postings. I just wanted to say that I am praying for you.

  16. 16 Diana
    August 13, 2008 at 2:01 am

    Suzy, no matter what, hope will be with you. I know that in the future, all will be good. I will always pray for you. Best wishes.

    Suzy, Hugs For You.

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